Actually, I love women and get along great with them. But I do live in CA and have seen most couples I have ever known get divorced. With some exceptions, not more than 10 to 20% of them. It is either when the husband is very dominant, or when he just gives the wife her way, that things work out the best. Have only ever known one couple that were successful with a truly 50-50 relationship. And, to be honest, I think that guy had a bit of an edge, 'cause his wife seemed inclined to usually go along with his way of seeing things.
Then I look at my sisters, from back East, and who is calling the shots in their relationships? Big sister says and does whatever she likes, and sometimes it is downright embarrassing, hearing the way she talks to her husband. He just shuts his mouth, and rolls his eyes, as if to say, "Well, you know what a ***** she is!" But he loves her, just the same. And she loves him. She has also been a fantastic parent to their 3 kids, two from his first marriage. But it is just accepted that she always gets her way, no ifs, buts, or ands, and don't ever think otherwise. I love her, think she is an awesome lady, can be very sweet(cause she always gets her way). But she is also a super*****, the minute things don't go her way. Her husband doesn't dare disagree with her about anything.
My younger sister is a total sweetheart from the word go. Her husband is very successful, a very smart guy, likes to live the good life(spare no expense), and likes to call the shots(you remind me of him). But she confided in me about 10 years ago, that she was planning on divorcing him. He was 100% faithful, would never look at another woman, but she felt he was too caught up in his job, traveled too much, and basically, she was tired of him calling the shots. When she told him, he gave up the megabucks job, and changed his whole life, just to please her, so she wouldn't dump him. I think he did the right thing, and they seem very happy together now.
BTW, my sis is also gorgeous, extremely intelligent, always upbeat, and very easy-going, a pleasure to be around. And a better mom , you will not find. She is and always has been one of my favorite people in the whole world, and I think the world of her. She really is an ideal woman in almost every respect. But in the end, she would have divorced him, had he not given up his ambitions, and changed his lifestyle to suit her. She loved him, but was not happy with the relationship any more.
And that pretty much describes my ex, who is a wonderful woman. I think the world of her, as well, and we get along great. I love her, but no longer as a husband loves a wife. But we have a very close relationship. There just came a point in the relationship, where things weren't working so well. She said it was making her unhappy, and it was her way or the highway. I'm simply not like my brother-in-laws. Truthfully, I think she soon came to regret her decision, but I didn't really think that it would be any different, if we got back together. Now she has adjusted, and seems happy with her life. We are good friends, and I bear her no ill will.
And I could not be happier that my kids have her for their mother. She would lay down her life for those kids. But, just the same, when she was unhappy, she was willing to put them through the pain, rather than make any compromise on her way of looking at things. She assumed that she was 100% right, and could, in no way, see my side of any situation.
BTW, my bro has a great wife. She is an old-fashioned Southern girl. When they start to butt heads, she will back off, give me a sly smile, and a wink and say something sweet to him. Works like a charm! She knows the meaning of "you catch more flies with honey!" But there is no doubt who wears the pants in that family. She was divorced from a guy who was a bit of a jerk, and she really appreciates a good man!
Being in real estate, may give me a somewhat slanted view of relationships. For one thing, I see a hell of a lot of divorces, where people have to sell the house. For another, I deal with a lot of women agents, who tend to be more hard-nosed and tougher than their male counterparts. And, especially, I see who makes the decisions, when couples are buying houses. 90% of the time, it is the gals, who decide where they will live, and which house they will buy. The guys have some input, but mostly they are trying to keep the wife happy. Which I guess is because it is not pleasant to have a grumpy lady around, and, also because they want to get laid.
I love women. I respect them, and get along great with them. And let me tell you, I have been SORELY tempted by some very nice gals these past few years. But I value my freedom, and understand what it means to give it up.
Paul, you are an alpha male. A guy, who is, by nature, very much in charge. And you have made that very clear on your thread about your relationship, although it was already very obvious to me. You were the one willing to tell her, "my way or the highway," when you butted heads over the debt for her Mom's operation. In that sort of a situation, many farang women will jump on that challenge. They will either back you down, or call it quits, and take you for half of what you own, in the process. Many guys will back down, or if she is smart, she will give them a face-saving option, so they can salvage their pride.
Of course, they are not all like that, especially not when they are younger. As they age, they get tougher. And there are some guys, who, right from the start, call the shots, and always will, because that is their nature. If they get the right gal, it can work very well for them.
But if that is the way women want to be, independent and strong, then that is their right, isn't it? I am not putting them down for being that way. It is what it is. I could put a whole positive spin on it. My daughter is a bit of a ball buster, and I am very proud of her. She's got more guts than all but a very few men.
So, it doesn't suck to see things as they are. Which includes there being some very accommodating women out there. And includes having a respect for women's desire to have more power in their lives, demanding a role in decision-making, and not deferrring to their husbands, as was the custom in my parent's days. But when women take the initiative to feel that they need to be more involved in decision-making, it seems to often eventually result in their getting their way. Because they tend to be way more patient, persevering, and determined, and will eventually wear down all but the toughest guys, over the course of the years.