Male Clients- urgent!

[Javier D]

I agree it is pertinent to both sexes, when I first started many years ago, I just put a short add in the Hull paper offering mobile massage!

I got about 250 phone calls from both sexes and I think one person who actually wanted a massage, I had to ask the first person who asked did I do extras what extras they where requiring, but you live and learn

 

[jambajuice22]

My fave phone call has to be "Oh it's a man massage." And then hung up.

My view is that it comes with the territory, its always going to happen. Never really bothers me, if callers wanted I could recommend some good websites that will have details of what they are after ... but they never ask. *Shrug*

Mat xxx

 

[Komkommer]

Hi peeps
I think its also worth mentioning there are people out there that know you are a professional therapist but take great delight in winding you up and talking to you as if you are a sex worker so no matter where you advertise callerslike these will find you.

steve

 

[HappyDiva]

Its a real pity, I'm a qualified therapist although I dont tell other therapists this when I go for a massage.(it makes some therapists slightly self conscious but if they are good and i want to go back to them i do tell them)

But when I do go for one to a new female therapist I always feel like shes thinking that I am "one of those" clients.

But then again I think security guards are watching me in shops!! So it could be just severe paranoia......lol

 

[Cameron]

very very true, any massage therapist that answers a phone will inevitably encounter a dodgy caller at some stage, the thing is to avoid having the dodgy caller make an appointment - it is a waste of the caller's time and the therapist's time. They are looking for a service that the therapist does not provide, many other people do, they can go to someone that does provide the service they are looking for.

If you do accept appointments from dogey callers most of them will just be embarassed by their mistake, though some will be annoyed you've wasted their time -the annoyed dodgey client is the concern, they could be annoyed and violent. If you don't let the dodgey caller have an appointment, you don't have to worry about the dodgey caller turning into an annoyed violent dodgeyclient.

Advertise in the wrong place, you will have a higher volume of calls that need screening, because you have a higher number of calls, but screening the calls is relatively easy, and you know where to not advertise in the future - all valuable experiences.


I think you are right, many therapists are cautious during the first appointment with a new client. I am sure some male therapists are thinking the same thing. I also think many people in many industries approacha new client with some caution -physio, dentist, surgeon, beauty therapist - do sometimes think "can I help with their condition?" and I think females experience that question more than males - I can't imagine a male doctor even contemplating they might not be able to help a patient, but I know female doctors that do wonder if they can help the patient the best way;I know a couple of dentists that dread new patients, and some of their existing ones, becauseof their bad breath, they hope the face mask will help enough, but not always ( I also know a couple of dentists that don't notice the patient's breath) There can be different reasons for someone's behaviour. I know my screeningof callers means that some people that have done too much in the garden over the weekend and need a massage ASAP on Monday will be filtered out by my dodgey caller screening, but I also know there are other therapists that don't screen callers the way I do, the caller will manage to find someone, and all they've wasted is the price of a phone call and a minute or 2 of their time calling me.

 

[?Rachie? ?Liz?]

Cola mentioned earlier about the danger of listening out only for sexual clues,and of course people working alone and allowing strangers into their homes are not opening themselves up only to threats of a sexual nature.
I was wondering if anyone had ever suffered any problems of any other type. For example, (and I'm not meaning to sound flippant about this, but you'll understand what I mean) a caller asking if your house was furnished with valuable antiques might be just as much of a "red flag"!

 

[bilson]

yes, questions about antiques, who else is in the house, if there is an alarm system, if there is a police station next door, if there is an expensive entertainment system in the building,are all possible red flags. A bit of common sense - if the caller wants to discuss things that are even more removed from what the treatment is about, you need to be careful. If they want to discuss things that make you feel uncomfortable, for whatever reason, don't let them make an appointment. If you met someone at the bus stop and they started asking about your antiques, who is normally home, if you have a safe behind a painting, common sense would be saying "don't invite them into the house" and it would probably be saying "maybe you should not get on the same bus with this person", you use the same level of common sense with callers. The red flags I mentioned before are mainly about people looking for extras without specifically asking about extras, but ANYTHING that common sense says is unusual should also be considered a possible red flag.

But some people are anti-antiques - eg Billy Bob Thorton has an antique phobia, can't be in a room with them, bigtime Holllywood movie star is not going to ring you up, but maybe his assistant could. I probably would consider someone asking about antiques as not the type of client I was interested in and someone else would get to massage Billy Bob Thorton.No single massage therapist can be the right massage therapist for all of the population, you're under no obligation to take appointments with every caller. It can be difficult at the start when finances can dictate the need to work on as many people as possible, but if you are uncomfortable about the client for any reason, they're probably going to pick it up anyway and not come back, either because you're not comfortable with them or they really were looking for something other thana massage, extras/antiques/whatever.

I have to admit I've always assumed people asking about who else is around and if there is a side entrance where they won't be seen
have alwyas been just looking for extras rather than scoping the place out for a robbery, whatever the reason, the result of not giving them an appointment means I will never find out for sure. If I did have a lot of antiques/safe behind the painting to be concerned about, I might be more aware of questioning along those lines.

 

[Magic But Mediocre]

I agree with Supersub and Cola that therapists who work from home need to be aware of the danger of theft (as well as of the other dangers which have taken more space on this thread).
I think that it is worth pointing out that the term ‘red flag’, which has been used several times on this thread, is actually ambiguous. A ‘red flag’ can be an absolute prohibition (as in the red flags on Spanish beaches which mean ‘danger: do not swim’) or it can simply be a warning.
I agree with the great majority of Cola's advice on 'screening'. But as a sports massage therapist, I have to be willing to treat a client who has a strained abdominal muscle or a strained adductor muscle. Therefore I still believe in a very cautious advertising policy. And as I mentioned on the earlier 'mobile massage' thread, there are some very successful sports massage therapists who have never advertised, and have built up their client base entirely through 'word of mouth'.


Alan

 

[eheqgumzikeigsecd]

considering that the only posts containing the phrase red flag are one from Supersub asking what is considered a red flag, this one from you saying how ambiguous a term red flag is and quite a few of my posts, if I clarify MY use of the term red flag it should make it much less ambiguous in this thread.A red flag means don't take the appointment - a possible red flag means be wary, add up all the possible red flags and if it equates to a standard red flag, don't take the appointment - that's why why there was the differeniation between red flag and possible red flag. I thought I'd made it fairly clear, but obviously not since you found it confusing. Hopefully this will end the abiguity.[/size][/font]

Sports massage therapists need to be able to treat conditions like that, which is why I have said if unknown clients say they NEED abs or groin work ASAP they should consider a sports massage therapist - most of the therapists working at home alone dealing with the dodgey phone calls are not sports massage therapists, they're usually holistic/swedish/aromatherapy massagetherapists.


The most important thing is the therapist is comfortable with the client; screening callers well makes it easier to be comfortable, as mentioned previously a cautious advertising policy is another way of avoiding phone calls from people; specialising in techniques which make it obvious you're doing therapeutic massage, or pregnancy/infant massage; whatever the therapist needs to do to get genuine clients and minimise people making appointments that maybelooking for something other than a massage (whether it be extras/thieving/power/whatever etc) should be done.
There are therapists that work in bustling clinic environments that can cater for the 'I need a groin massage NOW' callers. No therapists is obliged tocater to every possible client, there is always another massage therapist out there for the client to see. Waiting 48hr for a massage will not kill anyone, nor will never finding out about the therapist because of their cautious advertising kill anyone.

 

[Clare [:]

katherineiv, I've replied on your other thread [link=http://www.healthypages.net/forum/tm.asp?m=408171]http://www.healthypages.net/forum/tm.asp?m=408171[/link]rather than turn this into a website specific discussion.

I woudln't be without my website, I've had one for almost 10years now, it's been a HUGE boost to business, but callers from a website need to be screened very carefully.

 

[my life as erin (:]

thank you..... yes i do get alot of business from my site. and female

 

[Boomarotdow]

Hi katherineiv

I have just had a look at your website and the only thing I think that may give the wrong impression is the term 'stress relief'...............I know that you are talking about stress in the shoulders etc but even so to some men as soon as you use the word 'relief' they get the wrong idea....daft but sadly true! How about simply saying that you offer a massage of back, neck and shoulders which can help reduce stress and tension?

 

[Kamesh M]

I wanted to ask why is asking about an abdomen massage a red flag?

I'm studying massage at the moment and the tutor hasn't said we can't give men abdomen massages.

 

[Pompal 09.]

I'm not a therapist, but as a male client who has digestive problems and loves abdominal massage, I can answer this one. Abdominal massage probably has a higher probability of arousing a male. It does for me. Should this be alarming? Not really. If proper draping techniques are used, and the patient just lays there and enjoys the massage and does nothing out of ordinary, it shouldn't be an issue. As long as theclient lays still, keeps his hands at his sides and doesn't touch thetherapist or say anythinginappropriate,I don't see what the big deal is. I would think that most therapists should be trained and should actually expect that such a thing might happen - it's a natural reaction to having increased blood flow. Of course, some new therapists will freak out I am sure the first time they notice that a male gets aroused under the drape....it's not necessarily that the guy is sitting there having sexual thoughts. It's just that massaging the abdomen can naturally lead to arousal, regardless of whata guy is or is not thinking about.

If a new client asks about abdominal massage and draping a lot, especially right at the start, sometimes it is a hint that he is looking for extras and it can be a red flag...

 

[Peanut Butter]

I oncehad an email request from a male business man for full body massage for stress relief asking if he could be treated during the day as he didn't want his wife to know he was stressed
on the surface it looked genuine but my gut instinct was not to take him on and i think it was the stress relief bit that redflagged for me
I just replied and siad sorry I am not taking any new clients at present which is what i would say to anyone male or female that I felt uncomfortable with

 

[kokopelli9090]

Also didn't get the bit about antiques in the house? Is that some kind of kinky innuendo? Like the want to rub up against your grandfather clock or something?

 

[geiordqk]

never heard of the clock one either jadegirl.
Must admit we were told at college to never massage mens abdomen, all very interesting though.

 

[Emily Smith]

The antiques comment relates to people making enquiries as to what valuables you have for them to steal - the question was if anyone had ever had some supicious callers that seemed to be interested in more than a massage in a different way to the usual confused client thinking massage therapist means sex worker.

 

[AngelFace]

Yes, that was just a lightly flippant comment from me about the sort of thing that might make you tyhink twice about letting strangers into your home!
If it's any consolation, blokes get funny calls too: I was just going to bed the other day when a man phoned to ask if I was "closed". At that stage, brushing my teeth, I certainly was!

 

[New Yorker]

The subject of abdominal massage was discussed in more detail on the earlier thread [link=http://www.healthypages.net/forum/tm.asp?m=365690]Abdominal Massage? [/link]
Personally I have done two ’basic’ massage courses (an ITEC course and a LCM course). Abdominal massage was a compulsory element of each course and some of the female students practised on male students.

Alan