Funniest story you had with SPs

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Lets post some funny stories you have had in this hobby..

I will start ..

I booked one asian girl, arrived location and she offered drink but she was hardly speaking english. So while we were having a drink her cell phone started to ring she answered but like i said she cant speak english well and the guy on the phone was asking the address and she gave me to phone to talk to him.. lol.. well i talked to him about 10-15 mins he was asking all kind of questions like how she looks, her tits, her ass, face etc.. I said buddy i came here the bang her not to give you intel about her.. lol.. and he said he has appointment after me and asked me not to bang her hard and make her tired.. lol.. poor girl didnt understand a word what we were talking about.. it was funny and awkward time!
 
LOL : I said buddy i came here to bang her not to give you intel about her.. lol. :lol:
 
Can I play too?

Story 1:
In the middle of a very intense romp, we need to take a break to lubricate our engines. He gets the bottle from the nightstand next to the bed, sqeuezes out a decent amount on the important bits, and we resume the pumping. Half a second later, I'm overwhelmed by an intense burning sensation in my pussy, I push him away from me, and run to the bathtub screaming in pain.

Purell is NOT a good lubricant.

Story2:
This happened about a year ago, when I was working with an agency. I was meeting a new client at his hotel room downtown. I get to the room a few minutes early, knock on the door, and hear the gentleman inside tell me to come in. I get in, and he stands from the desk to walk toward me, with a surprise look on his face. I didn't think much of it, assuming he didn't expect me to get there a few minutes early, or that I look different than he imagined.

I greet him as I always do, with a bise on each cheek, while I say "Hi John, nice to meet you".

He starts laughing, and replies: "Hi. Nice meeting you as well. But I'm Bob".

Me: "Oh sorry. PhoneGirl must have given me the wrong name. Nice meeting you Bob."

Him [laughing even more]: Actually, I think that PhoneGirl probably gave you the wrong room number".

Me: ...

Him: [more laughing]

I somehow managed to blurb out some sort of apologies while bolting out of the room, mortified.
 
No. I washed up, took a few minutes to regroup, and fucked him silly.

I'm good that way.
 
I have a few to share but must run. Till tomorrow

There are also stories of weirdest places I've done it before. Not as shocking as 4x's car scenes with his babe but also funny
 
One day went to condo to see one. She opens door I walk in, she closes the door. I say you don't look like XYZ, she says no because I am ZYX. I said sorry but I asked for XYZ, oh she says XYZ in a couple of floors down. Phone person screwed up. LOL
 
Okay boys and ladies this is the funniest story of the year. Few of my friends knows this but i think its time to share..

I called one of the very popular agency for very popular lady. Booked her and arrived location 15mins early.. called the agency for room number and they said she is not ready and they would give me a call when she is ready. So i got coffee and started to wait. 15-20-25-30 mins no call yet... and i called the agency back and they said they are having a problem and they are trying to resolve it. So i said i will wait 15mins more if you are going to fix the problem.. so started to wait again.. i got a call from agency 5mins later... and the phone guy was having really hard time to tell me whats going on.. it was a Conference call.. the lady i wanted to see, agency owner, his partner and me.. they were like in the pain to tell me whats going on..lol.. so i said to the phone guy tell me whats going on.. and phone guy said to his partner that he is going to tell me whats going on.. and his partner was screaming at him not to tell me just cancel the appointment and offer me discount on next date.. lol. and finally phone guy told me whats going on.. He said they run out of towel in the room and they cant get more towel.. lol.. i said ok i will call you back and i did hung up the phone.. Got out of my car.. location was in downtown so i started to walk around.. saw canadian tire.. lol.. walked in.. did buy couple towels.. went back to my car.. call them again.. and said okay i got the towels anything else you need? lol.. they all 3 were ( 2 owners of the agency and the SP ) laughing like crazy on the phone.. and they said you are a stubburn guy.. so after 1 hour 15 mins later i got the room number.. went upstairs with towels in my hand.. when i saw the lady we couldnt stop laughing about it..

And it was one of the best session i had!
 
WINNER of the funniest story of the year :lol:
 
I was seeing a girl named Chinese Chrystal who has since retired I believe. There must have been like air in the condom because we both kept hearing this sound that sounded like a fart but we both believed that it must be the other person. After I finally came she said "I have never been with a guy that farted all through the sex. I said me? I thought it was you I wondered what you had for lunch but we finally figured out it was neither. I'm sure you have heard that sound at some time.
 
I had an embarrassing moment a few years ago. I had laid off the gym for a few months and had decided to go back and start exactly where I had left off. On this particular day I hit the squat rack hard. Lots of reps, lots of weight as if I never took anytime off. Followed by lots of leg curls, yup I felt like a monster as I strolled out of the gym that day.

Later that afternoon I booked a session with a high energy SP. I remember kneeling on the bed, getting a vigorous BBBJ, then laying on the bed as the BBBJ continued. Then a nice 69 as I still layed there on my back with her on top. Then she rode me, still on my back and her on top.

Then she asks me "quick get up I want it doggy", loving it when a woman tells me what she wants, I quickly stand up and crash, I fall to the floor beside the bed and I am looking up and see this gorgeous round ass on the bed above me, and hear, "hey where did you go?" "Hurry up stick it". I try to get up and I can't feel my legs. She finally realizes and rushes to my side trying to lift me up. Poor girl had to massage my legs just to get me up. MAN was I embarrassed, needless to say suffered through 3 days of the worse stiffness I have ever felt. The stiffness was in all 3 legs because I never did get the chance to finish that session and I couldn't blame the poor lady, it was all my fault. :oops:
 
Gen: I am sure this happens more than most people are aware. My story is only slightly different. I actually answered the door, and the young lady greeted me enthusiastically, with a DFK, and a big hug, right there, a few steps inside the doorway. I knew who she was, as I had tried to book her, but was told that she was not available that evening. In fact no one on my TDL was available that evening. As I was enjoying the kiss, I was thinking to myself, what should I do? As we started to break off the kiss, I told her that was really nice, and quite honestly, a little unexpected. She looked surprised, so I said, "you are certainly welcome to stay, in fact I tried to book you this evening, but I think you have the wrong room number". She asked to use the bathroom, where she made a call. When she came out, she told me that the room numbers were transposed. She thanked me for my hospitality, said, "perhaps another time", to which I said "absolutely" she gave me a great DFK, a nice hug, and off she went.
 
I called an Agency in Windsor and booked a smokin hot 19 yr old , new to the business for a noon hour appointment. Agency called the room to confirm that she would be there in twenty minutes. About forty minutes later I called the agency back and asked if there was a problem. They said they thought she was already there. Then a knock on the door so I told them she just arrived. The girl came in and said, "I've been all over the second floor looking for room 105"! Yup, she was new. Imagine looking for a first floor room on the second floor!!!
 
LMAO!!!! That was freaken funny!

How did the session go Don?
 
Gen, that's not right. That's quality pussy he was burning. That ain't right :shock:

thetank
 
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    Kharghar
  31. Red Rose Spa:
    ๐ŸŒธ We have 7 hot brown girls today ๐ŸŒธ ASHA, MALAY, SANA, AMANDA, EVE, AAVI, MAY, KIRAN ๐ŸŒธ 2588 Birchmount ๐ŸŒธ 2 Invergordon ๐ŸŒธ 647-702-8800 ๐ŸŒธ Please visit for a great erotic massage
  32. Lily Spa:
    โค๏ธ SARIKA, CAMILLA and KK are here today for your massage needs โค๏ธ Lily Spa โค๏ธ 2190 McNicoll โค๏ธ Scarborough โค๏ธ M1V 5M2 โค๏ธ (647) 531-8288 โค๏ธ
  33. SpringGreen.:
    Spring Green Spa - 72 Gerrard St W. 2/Fl - 647-891-0699Today we have 5 girls on Friday๏ผš๐Ÿ’‹๐Ÿ’‹New jap girl Tina๐Ÿ’‹๐Ÿ’‹ :heart4 Diana - Tanned Spanish beauty with large melons and a fun booty too Wendy- exotic goddess with a gymnasts body and corresponding flexibility CiCi- Exotic beauty with great service...
  34. Jennyโ€™s Spa:
    ๐ŸŽ‰๐Ÿ’JENNYโ€™S SPA๐ŸŽ‰๐Ÿ’ โœ…5170 DUNDAS STREET WESTโœ… ๐Ÿ‘ŒETOBICOKE ONTARIO M9A 1C4๐Ÿ‘Œ โ˜Ž๏ธ(647-893-5196)โ˜Ž๏ธCall or Text โ˜Ž๏ธ(437-888-3759)โ˜Ž๏ธCall Only (ETOBICOKE) OPEN 10am to 9pm MONDAY to SUNDAY ๐Ÿ”ฅโœ…GRAND OPENING๐Ÿ’ฏNEW GIRLS EVERYDAY๐Ÿ”ฅEXCELLENT MASSAGE + SERVICE QUEENS NOW AVAILABLE AT JENNYโ€™S SPA FOR ALL YOUR MASSAGE AND SPECIAL EXTRA NEEDS๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ’ฏ๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ”ฅโค๏ธ๐Ÿ‘Œ ๐Ÿ”ฅTWO BEAUTIFUL NEW YOUNG ASIAN GIRLS EVERYDAY๐Ÿ”ฅ ๐Ÿ’ฏREAL PICTURES OF ATTENDANTS๐Ÿ’ฏ ๐Ÿ”ฅTODAYโ€™s ROSTER INCLUDES: Anna๐Ÿ˜˜- A stunning sexy girl from Hong Kong
  35. Moneylee:
    All season wellness center : New Young girl big breasted beautiful buttocks charming temperament big boobs Michelle,young girl pretty face nice figure Thai deep massage Aad,Young girl big breasted beautiful buttocks charming temperament big boobs Yoyo,Young girl Big breasted saucy naughty Ella ,Enchanting sexy petite deep massage Sherry ๐Ÿ address: #5-30 Rambler dr Brampton ,Ontario L6W 1E2โ˜Ž๏ธ4376655510 ๐Ÿ‘…๐Ÿ‘…๐Ÿฆต๐Ÿฆต๐Ÿˆต๏ธ๐Ÿˆต๏ธ๐Ÿ‘„๐Ÿ‘„
  36. Moneylee:
    Full season wellness center: New Young girl big breasted beautiful buttocks charming temperament big boobs Cici , Young girl pretty face big boobs nice figure deep massage Jessica ,Young girl Big-breasted big Big boobs big butts May, Young beautiful face sexy body and good deep massage Maggie,Enchanting sexy petite deep massage Mary . ๐Ÿ  2560 Shepard Ave Mississauga unit 1 โ˜Ž๏ธ 4379857899 ๐Ÿ‘„๐Ÿ‘„๐Ÿฆต๐Ÿฆต๐Ÿˆต๏ธ๐Ÿˆต๏ธ๐Ÿ‘…๐Ÿ‘…
  37. Lulu1980:
    Phoenix blossom Spa โ™จ๏ธโ™จ๏ธโ™จ๏ธtable shower body scrub ๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒนevery day 3 girls,Cici and Mia and Jenny๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒนso sexy girl very good service deep tissue massage ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ‘5124 Dundas St W Etobicoke โ˜Ž๏ธ416-817-3366๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ
  38. bnwellness_wilson:
    Blue Nile Wellness Center, we have 4 young beautiful girls are working today, young fun Tina with curve body and young sweet student with Summer , pretty GFE Lina and sexy Coco are providing deep tissue and sensual massage, pls call 416-3985777 book appointment and walk in aways welcome, back entrance and parking available, 350 Wilson Ave North York
  39. Annie Spa:
    ๐ŸŽ‰๐Ÿ’ANNIE SPA๐ŸŽ‰๐Ÿ’ โœ…7-1001 SANDHURST CIRCLEโœ… ๐Ÿ‘ŒSCARBOROUGH ON M1V 1Z6๐Ÿ‘Œ โ˜Ž๏ธ(437) 818-8896โ˜Ž๏ธ โ˜Ž๏ธ(416) 291-8879โ˜Ž๏ธ (FINCH & MCCOWAN) OPEN 10am to 9pm MONDAY to SUNDAY ๐Ÿ”ฅโœ…NEW MANAGEMENT๐Ÿ’ฏNEW GIRLS๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ ๐Ÿ”ฅGORGEOUS NEW YOUNG ASIAN GIRLS - TODAYโ€™s ROSTER INCLUDES: ๐Ÿ”ฅ Bella ๐Ÿ˜˜ is a beautiful Vietnamese busty girl, very sexy, with RMT style massage and very good playful service. She excels at teasing and is an open minded service queen willing to make you very happy. So friendly and so sweet with excell
  40. Birchmount&14th:
    FRIDAY at ๐๐ˆ๐‘๐‚๐‡๐Œ๐Ž๐”๐๐“ & ๐Ÿ๐Ÿ’๐ญ๐ก: SUMMER & YUKI. Birchmount Rd & 14th Ave., Markham, ON. Call or Text for details and appointment. โ˜Ž๏ธ ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿฏ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿต๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿฏ๐Ÿณ๐Ÿฐโ˜Ž๏ธ SUMMER is a beautiful, tall, and very versatile Thai lady. ๐—ฌ๐—จ๐—ž๐—œ is here today to provide an amazing professional massage. We are open 24 Hours daily. We have clean rooms and plenty of free parking.
  41. Dreaminn:
    FRIDAY at ๐Ÿ’ญ๐——๐—ฅ๐—˜๐—”๐—  ๐—œ๐—ก๐—ก ๐—ช๐—˜๐—Ÿ๐—Ÿ๐—ก๐—˜๐—ฆ๐—ฆ ๐—ฆ๐—ฃ๐—”๐Ÿ’ญ: HONEY, KELLY & TINA. 10225 Yonge St (North of Major Mackenzie), Richmond Hill, ON โ˜Ž๏ธ ๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿด๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿต-๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿต๐Ÿด๐Ÿฏ โ˜Ž๏ธ HONEY is a beautiful slim Asian lady with an ample bosom, slightly curvy with a great ass. Her services are highly sought after. KELLY is a young & pretty Asian girl, very slim model figure, 5โ€™3โ€ with unreal bbbj skills & very liberal services.
  42. Endless Joy Spa:
    โœจโœจโœจโœจโœจ[GRAND OPENING]โœจโœจโœจโœจโœจ ๐Ÿ’žEndless Joy Spa๐Ÿ’ž ๐ŸŽ‡ (155 East Beaver Creek Rd Unit #8, Richmond Hill) 416-731-8565๐ŸŽ‡10am-2am, Young Sexy CBC Rachel. Slim Sexy Chinese Kiki, Tall Slim Sexy Chinese Kelly, Young Sexy Chinese Abie.
  43. SunriseRH:
    FRIDAY at ๐—ฆ๐—จ๐—ก๐—ฅ๐—œ๐—ฆ๐—˜ ๐—ฆ๐—ฃ๐—”: MICHELLE & SUMMER. 10 East Wilmot St, Unit 27, Richmond Hill, on โ˜Ž๏ธ ๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿฏ๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿฑ-๐Ÿด๐Ÿฌ๐Ÿด๐Ÿฒ โ˜Ž๏ธ MICHELLE is a young, curvaceous beauty, 5โ€™2โ€ & 130Lbs, 37DDD-31-41, a trim waist, and a nice butt. Come and be pampered. SUMMER is an incredibly sweet Asian babe, 5โ€™3โ€ with a captivating 36D-28-39 figure, weighing 108 pounds. Summer has very good massage & services.
  44. NewOriental:
    FRIDAY at ๐Ÿ๐Ÿ’š๐—ก๐—˜๐—ช ๐—ข๐—ฅ๐—œ๐—˜๐—ก๐—ง๐—”๐—Ÿ ๐—ฆ๐—ฃ๐—”๐Ÿ’š๐Ÿ: HAPPY & LULU. 10 East Wilmot St, Unit 26, Richmond Hill, on โ˜Ž๏ธ ๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿฏ๐Ÿด๐Ÿญ-๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿด๐Ÿด โ˜Ž๏ธ HAPPY is a slim & busty Korean lady with great massage skills & lots of extra fun. LULU is a friendly and very sexy Vietnamese girl with natural B Cups, and a slim to medium frame. She is a lot of fun, and can be wild at times.
  45. ASPA:
    ๐—™๐—ฅ๐—œ๐——๐—”๐—ฌ ๐—ฎ๐˜ ๐—” ๐—ฆ๐—ฃ๐—”: ๐—”๐—บ๐˜† & ๐—ฏ๐—ฒ๐˜€๐˜ ๐—บ๐—ฎ๐˜€๐˜€๐—ฎ๐—ด๐—ฒ ๐—ฅ๐—ฎ๐—ฐ๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—น ๐Ÿ…ฐ๏ธ๐€ ๐’๐๐€๐Ÿ…ฐ๏ธ, 28 South Unionville Ave, Unit 5, Markham. ๐Ÿ…ฐ๏ธ๐—–๐—ฎ๐—น๐—น ๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿณ๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿต-๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿฌ๐Ÿฒ ๐—ผ๐—ฟ ๐˜๐—ฒ๐˜…๐˜ ๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿด๐Ÿฏ๐Ÿต-๐Ÿฑ๐Ÿต๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿฒ๐Ÿ…ฐ๏ธ AMY is young and very friendly, standing 158 Cms. with 34C Cups and a very nice bum. Amy is a very popular student, young, sexy, and open minded. She is in demand for her good massage
  46. HolidaySpa:
    Friday at ๐ŸŒด๐Ÿ˜Ž๐ŸŒ…๐“—๐“ธ๐“ต๐“ฒ๐“ญ๐“ช๐”‚ ๐“ข๐“น๐“ช๐ŸŒ…๐Ÿ˜Ž๐ŸŒด3517 Kennedy Rd, Unit 4, Scarborough โ˜Ž๏ธ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿฏ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿญ๐Ÿญ๐Ÿต๐Ÿตโ˜Ž๏ธCindy & Lina Cindy is a slim & incredibly sexy lady with a smile that will melt your heart, & an ass that will fire up your spirit. Her services are among the best! Lina is very well known for her great services and her impressive shapely ass. Come and see why! You will be glad you did.
  47. ForeverWarden:
    Friday at ๐Ÿซฆโค๏ธ๐Ÿ”ด๐ŸŸฅโ™พ๏ธ๐“•๐“ž๐“ก๐“”๐“ฅ๐“”๐“ก ๐“ข๐“Ÿ๐“โ™พ๏ธ๐ŸŸฅ๐Ÿ”ดโค๏ธ๐Ÿซฆ 2190 Warden Ave, Unit 201, Scarborough ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿญ๐Ÿฒ-๐Ÿด๐Ÿฌ๐Ÿฌ-๐Ÿณ๐Ÿด๐Ÿด๐Ÿณ: Cindy, Mia, Nana & Sasa. Cindy is a slim beauty, 5โ€™4โ€, natural C Cups & wonderfully long nipples. Her massage is nice, her bbbj will drive you wild & her cfs finish is a dream come true. Mia is a Caribbean service queen temptress with incredible curves. She can bbbj like a queen, & is open to dfk & cfs.
  48. Moon203:
    MoonMoon spa/416 887 8801/8131Yonge st #203 Persian Turkish i today
  49. Sparkling Spa:
    SLIM, SEXY JAPANESE CHANEL AND SEX GODDESS ZOE WORKING TODAY @โšก๏ธ๐ŸŒŸSPARKLING SPAโšก๏ธ๐ŸŒŸ โœ…50 Lockridge Ave Unit 8โœ… ๐Ÿ‘ŒMarkham, ON L3R 8X4๐Ÿ‘Œ โ˜Ž๏ธ(905) 604-8186 Spa Land Lineโ˜Ž๏ธ โ˜Ž๏ธ(437) 446-6688 NEW Spa Cell Phoneโ˜Ž๏ธY๐Ÿ”ฅโœ…NEW MANAGEMENT๐Ÿ’ฏNEW GIRLS๐Ÿ”ฅSUPERSTAR SERVICE QUEENS AVAILABLE AT SPARKLING SPA FOR ALL YOUR MASSAGE AND SPECIAL EXTRA NEEDS๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ’ฏ๐Ÿ˜˜
  50. Red Rose Spa:
    ๐ŸŒธ We have 7 hot brown girls today ๐ŸŒธ ASHA, MALAY, SANA, AMANDA, EVE, AAVI, MAY, KIRAN ๐ŸŒธ 2588 Birchmount ๐ŸŒธ 2 Invergordon ๐ŸŒธ 647-702-8800 ๐ŸŒธ Please visit for a great erotic massage
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