Attention MPAs & Owners: 2 new female T.O. inspectors!!

[Renee Z]

ALL the good seasons of 90210???? I'm on my way. Want me to bring over some carrot sticks and cranberry juice???? I'm a healthy whacker. Maybe we can look through some of my playgirl magazines too and drool over the hotties in there. What's LFK?

 

[teezera]

when I saw him, I thought he was these gangster people that my stupid bf owes money to. What happened was that the week before, there was 1 black guy and 3 middle eastern guys with hockey sticks at my bf's place trying to kick our door down. When I told them to stop kicking our door, they said they were going to kill me and my bf b/c he owes them $20,000 (or was it $50,000? I can't remember) Anyways, I had to PRETEND to call the cops b/c our stupid phone line was cut off (no $ to pay bill) and I had forgotten my cell-phone at work but still they kept on kicking our door for at least another 5 minutes. I got scared so I tried to escape thru the window but I wasn't strong enough and I ended up injuring my hand and had to take off work for a week. (And LISTEN TO THIS!! After those people left, I called my bf from a payphone to tell him what happened and guess what he says??!! "Don't worry baby, they're just trying to scare you. Anyways, gotta go." And I'm like..."WHAT!!!!!!" I can't believe it!! Almost friggin' got killed and my stupid bf didn't even take it seriously!!) So when those LE came in that day, it was actually my first day back to work, so when the guy with the glasses woke me up, I swear, he scared the cr*p out of me!!! I was like... I thought those gangster people had found me and I was going to be chopped liver for sure!!



What a terrific story teller Leah is.
l could listen to her all day long.
Too bad about the crappy boyfriend...no one deserves that kind of inconsiderate treatment. No on deserves to have their life jeopardized because of anothers' stupidity.
Leah, l feel for you.

 

[Wee Jess]

You know it. I have the episode where Donna Martin gets shit faced at David's fathers house before the prom, waiting for you. In between our LFK, we can scream "DONNA MARTIN GRADUATES!!!!".



You know I do.



You're fucking perfect. I'll show you all the nude pics of Frank Sepe I have. You'll be dripping.



That thing your psychic told you you'd enjoy doing with some silly boy over the holidays.

 

[bsk]

Oh my gosh, I just finished going to this "$20 bill" psychic and seriously, she TOTALLY freaked me out. It's New Year's day today so I decided, well, what the heck, might as well find out my fortune for the coming year. So I went to this psychic's place with my whacker friend tonight to get a reading. Our other whacker friend already told us that this psychic needs ONE "$20 bill". Not 2 "$10 bills" or 4 "$5 bills", or a "$50 bill or a $100 bill, it must be 1 "$20 bill". So I went first. She took me into this one room, there's 2 chairs there, about 6 feet apart but facing each other. She sat on one, I sat on the other, I gave her my $20 bill and she asks me for my birthdate, birthtime, and birthplace. She stares at the bill and starts mumbling. I couldn't really make out what she was saying but it was something like this... "mumble mumble...... let me open the Book of Life and Death... mumble mumble.... (my birthdate, time and place)... mumble mumble.... more mumble mumble..." then she said, "you have really good health. Health is never an issue with you. And you make money. Very very good money. But not in gambling. You always lose when you gamble. No, you have to make your own money. You're in the service business. You work with your hands. But your business is not proper. You take off your clothes to make money (I swear to God, she said that!!) You make lots of money but you are not careful with it so a lot of it is gone. But you are not here tonight to listen to me talk about your health or your money. You are here tonight because you want to know about your love life and your man and what the future holds. You have a man right now who you like a lot. And he likes you a lot too. But you guys are always fighting. Non-stop. And your goals in life are totally different. I see a very, VERY turbulant love life for you this coming year." She stops. She looks up at me. "I see 2 little kids (she meant 'spirits') but I don't think they're yours. Did you have any abortions?" I tell her "no". She continues. "I didn't think so. But I see 2 little kids. One boy. One girl. I think they're your "lost" brother and sister. Your mom "lost" a child and your father had a child that was "lost" too but with a different woman. Did you know that?" I told her that I did know my mom miscarried before I came along but I don't know about my dad's situation but I told her it's highly probable because my father always fooled around on my mom. "And you just changed jobs recently. And you're much happier with this new place. Your other boss was not very nice to you girls. Always putting you guys down. Don't worry. No big problems with work this year. You'll make lots of money. But your bf... he's a very tall, very good-looking guy. You met him at your previous workplace. He did work when you first met him. Then he got lazy and stopped working. There are jobs out there for him but he just doesn't want to go. But before he came along... you were with another man. He was shorter and chubbier and not as good looking. You were with this other man for a very long time but you left him. Didn't want him anymore. He was a good man. Very hard-working. Very intelligent. Very rich...." Then she described my whole relationship with my ex and she was right on the dot with EVERYTHING. But I wanted to know more about my love life so I asked her again. All she said was that next year would be very turbulent. Then I asked her straight up. "I went to one astrologer a while ago and he said I'm gonna meet someone new this February or March. Is that true?" She said yes. I was surprised. Did I hear wrong? So repeated my question. "I went to one astrologer a while ago and he said I'm gonna meet someone new this February or March. Am I going to meet someone this coming February or March." Again she gave me a definite "yes". So now, I'm confused. Why didn't she say so earlier. I mean, she just kept on saying that I was going to have a turbulent love life this year but she didn't mention about me meeting someone new until I bought it up. What's up with that? My whacker friend (the one who told us to go to this psychic) told me afterwards that some people believe it's bad luck to reveal too much of someone's future so I think this $20 psychic knows more than she's willing to reveal. I mean, if she can "see" the "Book of Life" (aka the arkashic records), wouldn't she be able to "see" the future. Or maybe she just didn't want to tell me what would happen because then, I wouldn't be living my life... I'd just be acting out her predictions. Anyways, after my reading, my friend got her reading done too (I was the guinea pig) and when we left there, we were both freaking out. We both agreed that so far, she's the most accurate psychic of all. My friend's been married twice, divorced twice, has two dogs, just bought a condo... she was able to see all that. And she miscarried once and right now, have no kids, and she "saw" that too. My friend also agreed that she also didn't tell her too much about her future either. Some little predictions but not a lot. Oh well. Anyways, I tipped her $50 extra since she was like 1000 years old and I thought she deserved more than she asked for. Now, I guess I'll have to wait 'til February or March to see if their prediction comes true. I already fired my 2 previous psychics so we'll see if these 2 new ones do better.

 

[escapenletgo]

LMFAO, best self-prescribed term for a mpa evah. EVAAAAH

You are my new favourite Whacker.

 

[TheEditor]

Doesn't sound very realistic to me -- not in Canada anyway. I don't think there is such a thing as a "solicitation" charge in Canada. There's a charge of communicating in a PUBLIC place for the purpose of prostitution, but I doubt a room inside a MP would be considered a public place.

And in your scenario, it would be LE who would be the criminals for running a bawdy house, and they would have to charge and get themselves convicted in order to then have the customers and MPAs convicted on summary charges.

 

[Eric Davidson]

leah...your like a superhero. Although are you sure they had hockeysticks? Seems a little too regional.

 

[oRtEgA]

Leah_MPA:

Just curious. February and March already passed. Did you meet anyone new? Or do you need to find another new psychic?

 

[NecropolisXR]

"meet" and "person" are such vague words. In a two month period that could include standing in front of someone at a store or a new customer.

 

[Gary C]

Actually, if they did set up something like this, they'd probably end up wasting a lot of time and money for nothing. (It's not exactly cheap to set up a MP, at least $25,000 - $30,000 minimum). Believe me, all clients and whackers talk, and gossip spreads like wildfire in this kind of business. I remember a few years ago, there was an ad in "The Eye" (or was the "The Now"?) magasine which read, "Blonde Doll. $200." A client of mine went there and he told me a beautiful woman answered the door, asked for $200, he gave it to her, then he was lead into a room with a blonde inflatable doll on a bed and the woman says, "O.K. you can go and f*ck her now." A man (probably the bf) came out from nowhere and asks, "Is everything o.k. baby?" My client got so scared, he took off. I swear, probably within 1 week, half the Toronto knew the story b/c I told ALL my whacker friends, and they went and told ALL their clients and their friends, and their clients and their friends told ALL their friends, etc, etc. (Just like the thing with the 2 new female inspectors) So if LE did something like this, trust me, they wouldn't be catching too much of anything. Besides, most people go to MP through recommendations.

 

[catinhat]

Hi MLAM and fellow massageplanet.netites!! Trust me, NOBODY knows about my life except you guys. I mean, Leah's not exactly my real name you know. For me, coming here on massageplanet.net is kinda like writing in my diary. All except this is much better because I actually get responses. Most of the girls I work with think I have the PERFECT bf and you know what... I let them believe it. [Everytime I work at a new spa and he comes pick me up... I swear... ALL, (and I mean ALL) the girls flock to the window to check him out. The first time my married boss saw him, she said to me, "Is THAT your bf? He's GORGEOUS!!"] I know that some of my closer friends probably knows that things are not "that perfect" because I've never mentioned anything about spending the rest of my life with him. And I know at least one of them suspect that he's been taking my money b/c she asked me straight up why I'm always broke and if my bf's been spending my money. But would I EVER admit to being in a relationship that is less than perfect?? NO WAY!!!! And does any of them know he cheated on me with my best friend?? NOT A CHANCE!!! Why??? 'cuz EVERYTIME I tell ONE person (and I mean just ONE person!!) anything, the whole friggin' world knows. And you know what... I absolutely HATE that!!! That's why I don't tell any of them anything anymore because it's just happened once too many times!!

And my mom... I don't think she likes him eventhough she's never met him. She kinda have the sixth sense about people (she's seen his pictures). One of my aunts that I'm pretty close with, I know she doesn't approve of him either although she's also never met him. I think she, too, can sense whether or not I'm happy or not with someone. So although I've never actually come out and said anything negative about my relationship with my bf, I think the people who really knows me can guess the truth.

So I know, it seems like I'm airing all my dirty laundry out here but hey... nobody has a single clue as to who I am. There's probably a million whackers in the city, and I'm sure most of us have similar stories. Besides, I NEVER tell ANY of my clients I have a bf so there's no way anyone can figure out who I am by putting 2 and 2 together.

And love?? I must admit, I DID LOVE my bf ALOT at one point. My feelings only started changing when I started having feelings for the LE guy and I realized that my bf may not be the only guy I can have these passionate feelings for. (You can read more about it on the thread called, "Need advice: I'm a MPA starting to fall in love/lust?? with a LE officer") But now, those feelings are slowly disappearing which is probably good because now, he can't walk all over me anymore. I used to give him all my money, buy food for him all the time (can't cook), pay all our bills, etc, etc... Now??? Forget it!!! He can go make his own money and buy his own food!!!

How's our relationship like these days??? WWWWWWELL... listen to this. The other day, I was over at his place and I was really tired so I fell asleep. He woke me up by a passionate kiss and he murmurs, "hey baby, I missed you lots." I kiss his back, "I missed you too." Kiss, Kiss.
Him: "Did you pay the rent yet?"
Me: "No, I thought you were gonna pay it."
Him: "Noooooo, f*ck you."
Me: "Yeah???? f*ck you too!!!"
Him: leaves
Me: goes back to sleep

(well, there goes my whole 5 seconds of lovey dovey!! Guess no one's paying the rent again this month.)

Me: wakes up next morning, I'm pissed 'cuz he must've came back while I fell asleep again and he had gone thru my wallet. Anyways, since a**hole took all my money, I sold his phone for $30 to go shopping. (well, serves him right anyways... he sold my rice cooker twice, AND my toaster oven, AND my microwave...) Plus, we haven't paid our phone bill anyways and our phone line's cut off so what do we need a phone for?

So yup, that's my life with my bf.

 

[Glow]

Hi tarzan!!!! I think I finally found out why I haven't met anyone new.

The other day, I was over at a**hole's place, (yes, I'm still seeing him once in a while... His minutes are numbered though. I swear!!!) He wasn't home yet... When,... what do you know???..... There it was!!!!... His diary!!!.... just laying there... tempting me..............

SOOOOOOOoooo...... The good girl that I was.... Totally respecting other people's privacy.... Of course, did not look at it!!! Sure, I was curious to read what was in it, but nope... I did not look. Instead, I made some hot chocolate, put some cookies on a plate, totally ignoring a**hole's diary, made myself comfortable, and patiently waited, (like the good girl that I was), for my "Prison Break" show to begin. Suddenly, there was a loud knock on the door. I figured it must be a**hole coming home from work (yeah, right.... I wish!! More like he just finished hanging out with his friends, ran out of money, so decided to come home.) so I went to open the door. To my surprise.... guess who it was!!!! It was this big, gigantic, 7 foot tall, blue, furry,... Cookie Monster!!! He just pushed right past me, stopped, turned around, looked at me, pushed right pass me again, shut the door, grabbed me by my wrist, pulled me back to where I was sitting earlier, and said, "MMMmmmmmmmm..... COOKIES!!!" And he stuffed his face with all the cookies on the plate, making a huge mess, leaving cookie crumbs everywhere... And he drank the hot chocolate too. Then, he said to me, "I want a bed-time story." and opened a**hole's diary, pushed my face down on it, and make me read the whole entire diary to him. Page by page. Sentence by sentence. The whole thing!!!

"I swear, Mr. Judge!!!" (Me licking the cookie crumbs from the corner of my mouth) "That's what happened!!! Otherwise, I would NEVER read a**hole's diary!! I have TOTAL RESPECT for other people's privacy you know!!!"

So anyways, that's how I think I finally found out why I haven't met anybody else. And why I've tried breaking things off with him so many times and haven't been successful. His diary was actually more like a prayer book. It had the date on the top, and every entry started with, "Dear God...." And honestly, to my surprise, in his last paragraph to every entry, he always wrote, "And thank you God, for giving me Leah. She is the best girlfriend I ever had. I love her so much. Thank you for giving her to me. Please don't ever let her leave me. And don't let her find anyone better. Because if she does, I know she'd leave me. Thank you."

I just went !!!! That's really sweet..... But... WHAT AN A**HOLE!!!!!!!!!! No wonder I haven't found anyone else!!!! He prays like, 5 times a day, and probably, he always says the same prayer!!! Me??? I pray probably once a week. And it always goes like this... "Hi God. I hope you can hear me. I don't want to be with a**hole anymore. Please give me someone better so I can leave his a**. I don't want to be with him anymore. He's so mean to mee. Heee alwaaaaaaayyyyysss... zzzzzzzzzzzz" And I fall asleep. No wonder God hasn't listened to my prayers!!! He's listening to a**hole's!!! That's why!!!!! Oh well. What to do now????

 

[coral]

Hugh,

I think you misunderstood my post, What I meant was 3Tee's explaination seemed reasonable to me, not the part of whether or not the police setting up a sting massage parlour.

 

[Slim]

You guys are going to laugh when you hear this. I went again yesterday to visit the MPA who told me about the 2 female inspectors and listen to this latest gossip going around the MPs. Apparently, she heard from a MPA who heard from another MPA that when the 2 female inspectors went into this one MP, and there was a good-looking client there gettting a massage. The barged into the room, both the MPA & cleint was fully dressed. They took down the cleints informations, ID, and one of the female inspectors apparently was quite taken by the customer and they started flirting. Anyway, she was so busy flirting/chatting with him, she forgot to count how many MPA there were at the place so 1 of them stuck out the back door and took off!! Of course, don't know how true this story is..... maybe just MP gossips but what a laugh everyone's having.

'Wheatish'... So much for your theory of male LE officer not doing as good of a job due to being inveigled into overlooking offences by a cute MPA. At least, they're not busy chatting up the clients to miss the MPAs sneaking out the back door.

 

[kirst is back!!]

I hope this guy is your friend and not your boyfriend because heterosexual males don't keep diaries. Case in point - I keep a diary.

 

[Christian Soldier of God]

I was going to say the same thing.

 

[yotu]

One huge advantage of female LE is can now conduct body search of MPAs, if probable cause girls are hiding beyond MP limit objects on their body, such as condoms, drugs etc. Which they weren't able to before, except accompany by uniform or vice gals, we all know how few Five-O gals and how few want to show their face.

The recruitment drive was low-key, just happened to stumbled across it as rumor of openings at the city.

 

[The Lollypops]

Sorry to put a damper on your wild fantasy but truth is, I've been in the business for a long time now and I've never seen a cute MPA get away with offences just because she's cute. When you're caught red-handed, you're caught red-handed... no ifs, ands, or buts. No such thing as, "hey, you're cute... I'll pretend I didn't see your naked body sliding all over that guy over there. BTW, can I have your number?" Nope, it just doesn't work that way. When they barge in, there's usually 4 or 5 of them. And they're VERY business-like. It's not like they can say, "o.k. you're cute, so no ticket for you. But YOUUUU over there... you're only average-looking, so too bad. Here's your ticket. Try to be cuter next time so we can ogle you." Nope, no such luck. If it WAS like that, most of cute my whacker friends wouldn't have any tickets.

I worked with this one girl for a long time and she's model-like gorgeous. And she's got just as many ticket, (if not more), than me. It's sad to say it but I've lost count of how many tickets I've gotten over the years. Probably over 20. Trust me, if ANYONE were to get away with not getting a ticket because they're drop-dead gorgeous, it would be her. Don't forget, LE people go to these places all the time so they see gorgeous women all the time. After a while, we're probably are all the same to them... long hair, big eyes, pouty lips, tons of make-up, what's so special?...

One of my really good friends is an ex-cop. He used to be a cop back in his home country. He told me that while it was probably true that the first or second time he WAS excited to see all these beautiful women, after a few visits, they were all pretty much the same to him. Plus, even if there was some interest, he can not show favourism anyways because other cops are there too. Business is business. It's not like he's in there for fun. He's on duty!! Off duty, he can do whatever he wants, but on duty??.... maybe if he wants to get his a** fired.

 

[soo stoned]

No he's not gay, he used the ole' I pray for you in my diary trick. It works like a charm. Why else would he have left that out in the open? If guys are able to hide porn they are able to hide a diary.

BTW...I have prayers for Leah in my diary as well.

 

[freebienutter]

Good point.

Next time I go for a bodyslide, I'm "accidently" going to leave my diary on the table.