feeling so low

Penny Odel

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hi, i have had 2 disc ops so far L4/L5 and L4/S1 after the last op approx 10 months ago i fell over because my foot is numb from op 1 and does not always go in the correct direction anyway i fell on to my left shoulder and now have a shoulder imingement oh boy is this painful i also have flashes of numbness down my left leg and unbelievable pain in my left toes ,i have also had sciatica down my right leg which is now getting unbearable, thankfully iam seeing my consultant this week , iam hoping i do not need another op but feel like i do need at least 2 not to mention the surgery iam waiting for on my shoulder, i was taking oromorph but was so low i thought i was going to commit suicide but the gp did nothing and let me walk out crying saying i was going to kill myself, i thought its either help myself or just end it luckily i decided to stop the oromorph and obviously i have more pain but my state of my mind is slightly better, sorry for the ramble but i feel quite lonely at the moment and cannot see an end to all this pain.
 
Hi bmw1

Firstly - a big

I don't have any practical advice about your pain (sorry) but I wanted you to know that I am thinking of you and you are not alone - you've got HP now!!!

I hope your consultant has some answers - but your GP sounds crap - feeling for you - can't you go to another GP? You obviously can't go on like this & at the very least need someone sympathetic to your pain & emotional distress.

Would you like me to send you some Reiki &/or Crystal Healing?

Monica x
 
Hi BMW1

Please understand you are not alone. I too have felt very desperate at times with my back problems (I have posted quite a bit so won't bore you with details) and my GP has put me on an antidepressant which has helped so much. He also has offered counselling which I am considering at the moment. Please go and see a different Gp or if he is the only one available insist he does a depression score on you, it's like a mini questionnaire, it will determine whether you need antidepressants or not. A good GP will then monitor you and make you do the questionnaire every few months to check for improvement or worsening symptoms.

As a back pain sufferer I know how you are feeling and I agree there are times when I also would like my left leg chopped off, mainly at night when desperate for sleep and my leg won't stop jumping and twitching. I have a great husband to listen to me, but if you are alone and desperate the Samaritans are very good listeners and sometimes just getting stuff off your chest helps.

Please keep in touch with me and let me know how you are doing, take care Wend x
 
thanks for the replies, i have seen all the gp's at my practice and i have done the deppression questionaire and scored 10 on most of them but still they pass the buck saying wait till you see the specialist, i to think anti depressants would help but with all the pain killers iam taking i think they are afraid to give me anymore drugs, so its just take 1 day at a time, i go to bed at 6pm every night and watch tv there as its the only place i can get some relief from the agonising pain , i feel sorry for hubby as he also had L4/L5 done a few years ago and he also suffers from spasms in his leg, and because iam in so much pain i don't feel very sociable at the moment so we do not go out apart from shopping which is done as quick as possible then back home, some days my legs feel like jelly and i feel like its too much effort to walk, i guess thats maybe the depression.
 
I can't believe your GP is not taking your depression seriously. I don't think it's to do with the amount of tablets as I take 27 tablets a day plus oramorph every four to six hours. My consultant had nothing to do with my depression, but maybe yours will, when are you due to be seen?

I also spend a lot of time in bed, most days from 2pm on other than to come down to eat tea. Now my family come to me upstairs, many times there have been three or four of us on the bed watching a DVD. The up side I have found also is that my three children can come and have a bit of mum time on their own.

This would be my only advice, try and see the positives in a situation. I would love to go to a shop but only attend medical appointments, but this saves us a fortune on my impulse buying

Please keep in touch, it does help talking to another sufferer. Take care Wend x
 
thanks wend its nice to know iam not alone, iam seeing consultant for my back today after 10 month wait since last op ,but i know how it will go he will say we will get an mri and see whats happening , thats fair enough but that will be about a 3 month wait then if iam unlucky and need another op then it will be about another 8 months on waiting list, the thought of another year like this is almost unbearable, we have a new grandson the first but i cannot hold him for fear of dropping him because of my shoulder impingment and back pain, i think at night the nerve pain is the worst it makes you feel like chopping your toes off the pain is so bad iam on highest dose of pregablin but that does not seem to be working anymore, and have tried gabapentin but did not get on well with that one so will have to see if there is anything else he can suggest, take care helen x
 
Good luck with your appointment today. I left a message earlier on another post about the length of time all these things take. I can't believe 2 1/2 years have gone by and I am still not better. My last son goes off to uni in September and me and my hubby always said we would travel the world once they had all gone, now I struggle to travel to a docs appt. Make sure the consultant understands how desperate you are, you never know it might make a difference. I am not very good at this I hate showing emotions or getting upset so do the good old british stiff upper lip thing

Let me know how it goes. Take care Wend xxx
 
hi, i had my appointment yesterday with the consultant and as expected he is sending me for an mri scan , but he thinks my problem is scar tissue which he cannot do anything about at the moment, iam like you wend i do not like showing emotion it makes me feel weak ,but i explained how bad things were and he's writing to gp and he wants me to see pain clinic but i know there is a huge waiting list for that and i will not have the epidural that they will inevitabley recommend ( too much of a baby for that) so no further forward at moment.
 
hi i have read the entire string and really feel bad for the kind of pain you are in. having had back ache, sciatica and what nots for a very long time i can totally empathise with you.
one of the best cures i found and the reason i am upright today and functioning normally (12yrs now) is due to acupressure, it really does work miracles and is non invasive.

also get an amethyst ball and massage over the painful areas away from the body. will help with the pain and aid in tissue healing.

you can also use rhus tox mother tincture, (its homeopathic), apply a few drops on the painful spot or area and gently massage in and then keep area warm. not only will it reduce pain significantly but will also start deep tissue repair. (you may want to do a spot test before you apply to a larger area for allergy or reaction, though i find homeopathic medicines very safe).

you can also learn the pain mudras which you can to a few times a day.

if you need any more clarifications please do not hesitate to contact me.
thinking of you and sending a healing prayer for you.
love
 
Dear BMW1,

I feel for you, as I am currently suffering from a bad back incident from 3 weeks ago.. but lucky for me , after two visits to the A&E, 1 osteo app.. and 3 different GP visits ..I have found a GP that actually took the time and trouble to vet me out fully.. not only did she listen patiently to the full history before scribbling away any medication..but her examination was very detailed.. and she has now like you referred me to MRI scan soon.. I felt so hopeful with her..

She has given me Naproxen 500mg (strong painkiller) but also Lansoprazole to coat the stomach lining due to how strong Naproxen is.. then a prescription for a local analgesic cream to rub on , as well as yup you guessed it : 2mg per daily Diazepam for a week just to relax my muscles as well as to lift my spirit up a bit no doubt as I was in floods of tears with pain when I saw her..

I know different GP vary drastically.. and I don't plan on being on these medication for long ..already I am halving the tablets to regain self control and pain management.. but to me she was a God sent when i was in agony ..and unable to move!!

It took 3 useless and unempathetic to get to where i am today.. please don't lose hope..

You can also get this local analgesic cream without prescription."Algesal " . it will cost you £4.55 or there about.. get that..that's a start.. eat Turkey, ripe banana , and capsicum in your daily diet to boost your natural serotonin production..so your depression will be kept at bay..

But please please remember you do need a proper diagnosis and treatment so ..apart from the natural things you can do and try out.. keep with the doctors till you are sorted.. get someone to go with you.. if at times you lack the strength to fight your case .. also for moral support..

Good luck with it all..

With all my best wishes to your speedy recovery

Vathani X
 
Hi again
Let's hope the MRI can give you some answers. Have you had a discectomy and a fusion? I have had three epidurals and I have to say I found them to be only mildly uncomfortable, no worse than having a blood test, and much better than dentist injections. We all have different pain thresholds and to my mind when you have learnt to deal with back pain for a long time anything else is a breeze. I attend the pain clinic and the idea is to try and help you learn to live with your pain not get rid of it. This is done by keeping a diary to start with to see if there are any triggers, in my case just getting up more or less does it . They will then teach you coping techniques ie distraction, relaxation, deep breathing etc. For me the best thing they have helped with is on getting me the correct aids for my house, which I didn't know I could get free. My wait to see them was 3 1/2 months, so know about the wait very frustrating.

Keep in touch on how the MRI goes. Hope you are feeling a little better mood wise, but as my GP said Friday it is a huge adjustment coping with the disabilities our backs can cause and we are allowed to have days when all we do is cry. I am now taking up his offer of counselling so will let you know if helpful.

Take care Wend x
 
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    🎉🍒JENNY’S SPA🎉🍒 ✅5170 DUNDAS STREET WEST✅ 👌ETOBICOKE ONTARIO M9A 1C4👌 ☎️(647-893-5196)☎️Call or Text ☎️(437-888-3759)☎️Call Only (ETOBICOKE) OPEN 10am to 9pm MONDAY to SUNDAY 🔥✅GRAND OPENING💯NEW GIRLS EVERYDAY🔥EXCELLENT MASSAGE + SERVICE QUEENS NOW AVAILABLE AT JENNY’S SPA FOR ALL YOUR MASSAGE AND SPECIAL EXTRA NEEDS🔥💯😘🔥❤️👌 🔥TWO BEAUTIFUL NEW YOUNG ASIAN GIRLS EVERYDAY🔥 💯REAL PICTURES OF ATTENDANTS💯 🔥TODAY’s ROSTER INCLUDES: Apple😘 - Brand new girl from Taiwan just ar
  33. Sparkling Spa:
    ⚡🌟SPARKLING SPA⚡🌟 ✅50 Lockridge Ave Unit 8✅ 👌Markham, ON L3R 8X4👌 ☎️(905) 604-8186 Spa Land Line☎️ ☎️(437) 446-6688 NEW Spa Cell Phone☎️ (West of Warden & 16th Ave) OPEN 10am to 9pm MONDAY to SUNDAY 🔥✅NEW MANAGEMENT💯NEW GIRLS🔥SUPERSTAR SERVICE QUEENS AVAILABLE AT SPARKLING SPA FOR ALL YOUR MASSAGE AND SPECIAL EXTRA NEEDS🔥💯😘🔥❤️👌 🔥SEXY NEW YOUNG GIRLS ALWAYS WORKING - Today’s Schedule is…🔥 Foxy -🔥Your new addiction at Sparkling Spa! A tall 5’7” sexy Korean girl with a wild ro
  34. Moneylee:
    All season wellness center : New Young girl big breasted beautiful buttocks charming temperament big boobs Monica ,Young girl big boobs beautiful face deep massage Wendy ,Young girl big breasted beautiful buttocks charming temperament Lala,Young beautiful face sexy body and good deep massage Maggie, Enchanting sexy petite deep massage Sherry ,🏠 address: #5-30 Rambler dr Brampton ,Ontario L6W 1E2☎️4376655510 👅👅🦵🦵🈵🈵👄👄
  35. Moneylee:
    Full season Wellness center: New Young girl big boobs beautiful face deep massage Lucky, Student big boobs buttocks Vicky ,Young girl big breasted beautiful buttocks charming temperament big boobs Anjoo , young girl pretty face nice figure Thai deep massage Linda ,Enchanting sexy petite deep massage Mary. 🏠 2560 Shepard ave Mississauga unit 1 ☎️ 4379857899 👄👄🦵🦵🈵🈵👅👅
  36. SunriseRH:
    SATURDAY at 𝗦𝗨𝗡𝗥𝗜𝗦𝗘 SPA: JUDY. 10 East Wilmot St, Unit 27, Richmond Hill, on ☎️ 𝟲𝟰𝟳-𝟯𝟮𝟱-𝟴𝟬𝟴𝟲 ☎️ JUDY is a YOUNG AND ATTRACTIVE Chinese girl. Details to follow, & hopefully a pic...
  37. Annie Spa:
    🎉🍒ANNIE SPA🎉🍒 ✅7-1001 SANDHURST CIRCLE✅ 👌SCARBOROUGH ON M1V 1Z6👌 ☎️(647) 891-9688☎️ ☎️(416) 291-8879☎️ (FINCH & MCCOWAN) OPEN 10am to 9pm MONDAY to SUNDAY 🔥✅NEW MANAGEMENT💯NEW GIRLS🔥🔥 🔥GORGEOUS NEW YOUNG ASIAN GIRLS - TODAY’s ROSTER INCLUDES: 🔥 Ivy ❤️ is new girl in our branch, shy and sweet but also very vocal and needy, she demands your happiness and satisfaction. Slim body, supple soft breasts with long nipples and a toned bum bum will have you intoxicated by Ivy’s good looks
  38. Endless Joy Spa:
    ✨✨✨✨✨[GRAND OPENING]✨✨✨✨✨ 💞Endless Joy Spa💞 🎇 (155 East Beaver Creek Rd Unit #8, Richmond Hill) 416-731-8565🎇10am-2am, Young Slim Sexy Chinese Emma, Young Curvy Sexy Latina Karen, Young Slim Thai Janice, Young Sexy CBC Rachel. Slim Sexy Chinese Kiki, Tall Slim Sexy Chinese Kelly, Young Sexy Chinese Abie.
  39. NewOriental:
    SATURDAY at 🍏💚𝗡𝗘𝗪 𝗢𝗥𝗜𝗘𝗡𝗧𝗔𝗟 𝗦𝗣𝗔💚🍏: HAPPY & PHOENIX. 10 East Wilmot St, Unit 26, Richmond Hill, on ☎️ 𝟲𝟰𝟳-𝟯𝟴𝟭-𝟮𝟲𝟴𝟴 ☎️ HAPPY is a slim & busty Korean lady with great massage skills & lots of extra fun. PHOENIX is a gentle sweet Filipina lady, 5’4” and 105Lbs, with 34C-24-34 assets and very open minded.
  40. ASPA:
    SATUR𝗗𝗔𝗬 𝗔𝗧 𝐀 𝐒𝐏𝐀: Jenny and best massage Rachel. 🅰️𝐀 𝐒𝐏𝐀🅰️, 28 South Unionville Ave, Unit 5, Markham. 🅰️𝗖𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝟲𝟰𝟳-𝟳𝟮𝟵-𝟲𝟲𝟬𝟲 𝗼𝗿 𝘁𝗲𝘅𝘁 𝟲𝟰𝟳-𝟴𝟯𝟵-𝟱𝟵𝟲𝟲🅰️ JENNY is a sexy Asian honey, about 165 Cms., slim to medium build, beautiful natural 36C’s, long sexy legs & big hips, good massage & excellent services. Jenny has sexy smooth skin and a very good personality.
  41. HolidaySpa:
    Saturday at 🌴😎🌅𝓗𝓸𝓵𝓲𝓭𝓪𝔂 𝓢𝓹𝓪🌅😎🌴3517 Kennedy Rd, Unit 4, Scarborough ☎️𝟰𝟯𝟳-𝟮𝟰𝟳-𝟭𝟭𝟵𝟵☎️MAGGIE, TARA & YOYO. Maggie is a slim and very sexy Korean lady, very pretty and accommodating. Come and try, you will like. Tara is a young & pretty Asian girl with big melons and fun services. New Girl Yoyo is a very beautiful slim Chinese lady, 165Cms & 116 Lbs with natural D Cups
  42. Lily Spa:
    ❤️ KAJAL, NINA and KK are here today for your massage needs ❤️ Lily Spa ❤️ 2190 McNicoll ❤️ Scarborough ❤️ M1V 5M2 ❤️ (647) 531-8288 ❤️
  43. ForeverWarden:
    Saturday at 🫦❤️🔴🟥♾️𝓕𝓞𝓡𝓔𝓥𝓔𝓡 𝓢𝓟𝓐♾️🟥🔴❤️🫦 2190 Warden Ave, Unit 201, Scarborough 𝟰𝟭𝟲-𝟴𝟬𝟬-𝟳𝟴𝟴𝟳: Cindy, Niko & Tracy, *nicole tracy cindy Cindy is a slim beauty, 5’4”, natural C Cups & wonderfully long nipples. Her massage is nice, her bbbj will drive you wild & her cfs finish is a dream come true. Niko/color] is tall, very pretty, and slim with a sexy body, natural C Cups and long nipples.
  44. Dreaminn:
    SATURDAY at 💭𝗗𝗥𝗘𝗔𝗠 𝗜𝗡𝗡 𝗪𝗘𝗟𝗟𝗡𝗘𝗦𝗦 𝗦𝗣𝗔💭: ELSA, SOPHIA & TINA. 10225 Yonge St (North of Major Mackenzie), Richmond Hill, ON ☎️ 𝟲𝟰𝟳-𝟴𝟮𝟵-𝟮𝟵𝟴𝟯 ☎️ ELSA is slim, petite & very pretty student, early 20’s about 5’2” and 105 Lbs. Elsa has an innocent look about her, but she can drive you wild with pleasure, and provides a great massage. SOPHIA is a young & beautiful 21 year old Vietnamese lady, slim
  45. bnwellness_wilson:
    Blue Nile Wellness Center, we have 4 young beautiful girls are working today, young sweet student Sophia and young cute Yoyo with 36DD , pretty Ella and fun GFE Lina are providing deep tissue and sensual massage, pls call 416-3985777 book appointment and walk in aways welcome, back entrance and parking available, 350 Wilson Ave North York
  46. Lulu1980:
    Phoenix Blossom spa ♨️♨️♨️ table shower body scrub 👍👍👍We have 3 beautiful young girls working today, young and lovely new girl Suki and Tiffany Specialising in table shower body scrub massages and offering deep massages Cici🤗🤗🤗🤗5124 Dundas St W Etobicoke.Please call ☎️416-817-3366 to book and Walk in the back door there is plenty of parking available
  47. Red Rose Spa:
    🌸 We have 5 hot brown girls today 🌸 PAYAL PEARL, MONIKA, NIMRAT, PAOLA, RAVEN, MALIYA, AAVI, KANIKA, KIRAN 🌸 2588 Birchmount 🌸 2 Invergordon 🌸 647-702-8800 🌸 Please visit for a great erotic massage
  48. Moon203:
    MoonMoon spa/416 887 8801/8131Yonge st Turkish Persian girl &big boobs BoBo in Friday and Saturday
  49. KSpa:
    FRIDAY at 𝐊 𝐒𝐏𝐀: HELEN, SUKI & CINDY. Unit B6-4227 Sheppard Ave East Scarborough, ON (Just East of Midland Ave) ☎️ 𝟲𝟰𝟳-𝟳𝟵𝟮-𝟳𝟱𝟲𝟴 ☎️ HELEN is a pretty Chinese babe, 24, 5’3” & 115 Lbs, can provide good services. SUKI is 23, 5’2” & 100 Lbs, 34C with a slim & sweet sexy body. CINDY is slim & pretty with a 5’3” sexy body, big boobs 34D, and a nice curvy bum. Cindy can relax all your cares
  50. SunriseRH:
    FRIDAY at 𝗦𝗨𝗡𝗥𝗜𝗦𝗘 𝗦𝗣𝗔: EMMA & SUMMER. 10 East Wilmot St, Unit 27, Richmond Hill, on ☎️ 𝟲𝟰𝟳-𝟯𝟮𝟱-𝟴𝟬𝟴𝟲 ☎️ EMMA is a very young girl from Portugal, tall, skinny & beautiful. SUMMER is an incredibly sweet Asian babe, 5’3” with a captivating 36D-28-39 figure, weighing 108 pounds. Summer has very good massage & services.
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