I am an agnostic. How can I introduce Christmas to my daughter?

[Beliel]

I want to introduce the holiday without bringing the religious aspect into it, as she is only 5. My family celebrates it as a secular holiday anyway, but she doesn't understand the whole 'Santa Clause' concept. I really don't know what to tell her. This may sound a little TOO sensitive, but since we've (my husband and I) been focusing on lying with her (what it is, why you shouldn't do it, etc.) lately, I feel a little weird telling her the St. Nick story; she would be upset if she found out it was a lie and call me a hypocrite (hey, she's smart, what can I say) Example: "You lied to me Mommy! You told me I could have a cookie after dinner and you didn't give me one!" "No, I just changed my mind because you decided to push the cat into the water bucket." She's understanding the concept quite well, but we're still working on it.

Also, I am willing to teach her about the religious aspect when she gets older, just not quite yet, as I want her to understand its a story SOME people believe in, and she doesn't need to 'adopt' that belief as her own if she doesn't want to. Suggestions? Thanks
@Vicki Your comment about my daughter is just rude an unnecessary.

 

[Internet for God]

Now I know why I'm not an agnostic.

I never had to apologize to my son when explaining to him about Christmas or Easter. Christmas is a celebration of the birth of Jesus Christ. I suppose you can put any spin on that any way you want to, but if you deny that fact, you'll be lying to her. Sure, I know all about that it was a pagan holiday and blah, blah, blah. But the celebration STILL centers around the birth of Christ. How do you get around that?

As far as Santa, I told my son from a very early age Santa wasn't real. He suffered no harm still respects me for that.

 

[Jack Black is back]

tell her it is an American Holiday and other countries have similar traditions but in America the tradition is that Santa Clause comes to give presents to children who are good.

 

[officersandy]

Explain to her that it is a special time of the year that all families get together to celebrate love. Let her know the Christmas tree is a long standing tradition all throughout history and gift giving is part of the tradition. Santa doesn't have anything to do with religion and it's a magical aspect of a child's life. Of course, they get old enough on their own to realize that Santa doesn't really exist. No big deal. The child will learn on her own that Christmas actually symbolizes the birth of God's son Jesus if she hasn't heard it elsewhere already. Whether she believes in Jesus or what Christmas symbolizes will be a choice that she will make on her own one day anyway. As far as Santa, let her have the magic....

 

[Technical Support Cat]

tell her the truth, it was a pagan holiday until the romans jacked it and made it about jesus.

 

[freetimeman]

Maybe you could get her to watch the movie, "A Christmas Story"....about the little boy who just wants a "Red-rider" BB gun....that should give her example of how other kids act and anticipate Christmas morning!...but please don't give her no BB gun, cause she might shoot someone's eye out.

 

[Nolfet]

I think you're taking the whole thing way too seriously. Secular society will eventually introduce her to some form of Christmas, and you're going to make some mistakes raising a child anyway, because you're human. If your daughter is only five, I wouldn't start talking to her about God, or the lack thereof, unless she asks you about it. If that happens, then you probably know to give her your opinion on the subject, without forcing some belief or lack thereof upon her.

 

[Vicky S]

well first of all , sounds like your daughter's one hell of a brat ! second ? christmas is about peace on earth & goodwill toward men ( and women ) . third ? jesus ( the bible says ) was born in bethlehem because mary & joseph had to register for the census ordered by the roman emperor augustus . that was in march........... not december ! st nick , kris kringle , santa claus all stem from an old legend (10th ? 11th ? century ) of a man who brought gifts to children to help cheer them up during the worst weather of the year............. usually december .

 

[Faith_Works]

I would challenge you to learn the story behind Saint Nick....it is actually pretty cool, it would lay some footings for your daughters spiritual journey.

 

[John]

Tell your daughter the truth about your belief in a way she can understand. " I'm an agnostic that means mommy doesn't know what the truth is about God the best evidence to me for the existence of God is thus and the best evidence for not believing in a God is thus." then proceed in explaining Christmas, "Many people have different customs and traditions this is a time of year where if you look you can see all sorts of them at one time." If you focus on the differences of Christmas she will be more able to make an educated decision for her self and you might be able to gain an understanding about the nature of God or not. but one thing you do not want to do is explain that to many people that give gifts to others the reason they give them is in honor of the greatest gift we as humans have received, the gift of salvation.( that would open up a can of worms that you wouldn't want to tackle. And please don't tell here about the Christians using ornaments on trees because it hurts the pagans feelings that we don't use animal entrails like they do.

Good Luck with your daughter. and the last thing i would say is, if you have a bible in your house please remove it ( it can be a real stumbling block) there are to many references to the truth not being subjective. your daughter needs to learn that the truth is only what she thinks it is and that anyone else that believes otherwise that is the truth for them.

 

[Mr. Smartypants]

At her age you can't explain it in great detail. The story of how Christmas developed is actually very interesting but it would bore a 5 year old.

But you could hit the highlights. Thousands of years ago people discovered that days get shorter and shorter in the Winter. Then, at a particular time, the days begin getting longer again. You might be able to explain this with drawings of the earth going around the sun, tilted on its axis. But even that might be a bit much for someone that young.

So anyway, thousands of years ago people didn't know what to make of this. They didn't really know what to believe, so they made stuff up. For instance some of them made up stories about a space monster taking the sun away, and a heroic 'man in the sky' fighting the monster and getting the sun back. (There actually were myths like this!) These stories are called 'myths', and people didn't really BELIEVE them but they served to explain why the world was the way it was.

In some cultures they had group of men in charge of making up these myths and teaching them to everyone. These guys had time to 'observe' nature and the skies. And before long they learned to figure out, ahead of time, the exact day the days would start getting longer. Of course everyone in the society wanted to know that! So these men would hold some kind of ceremony just on that day. And the days began getting longer, and it warmed up, and farmers' crops began to grow. People came to look forward to that day! When we have Winter now, we can look at a calendar and say 'It will start getting warmer in 2 months.' But in those days they didn't even have calendars so people didn't know WHEN it would get warmer. Maybe it never would!

Well, think of these guys holding this ceremony for years and years. After a while, people came to think that it was the ceremony itself that led to the days getting longer! Of course this was 'job security' for the priesthood that performed the ceremony. 8^)

So now thousands of years later, but still thousands of years ago, the Roman Empire changed from Paganism, which believed in many gods, to Christianity, which believed in one God. This is why Christianity is prevalent still today in the Western World. The early Christians wanted to stop the celebration of this Pagan holiday But it was just SO popular that they couldn't stop people from celebrating it. In the Pagan world it was the biggest holiday of the year, and people didn't want to give it up! So eventually, Christians decided that Jesus was born at that time, and that would allow people to still celebrate it without being 'pagan'.

So now to this very day, Christmas time is a time in the dead of Winter when you can't do a lot of other things. So people put up lights, they visit one another for dinner, special movies come out this time of year, and kids look forward to it because they get a week off school. Christians say it's all about Jesus, but he wasn't even really born in December, it was just an excuse all along to celebrate at this time of year. But you don't even have to be Christian to celebrate the Winter Solstice. We call it 'Christmas' but for many people, maybe even MOST people, it has nothing to do with religion.

 

[JOExHIGASHI]

TV specials

 

[sailormandave]

Young girls usually like presents. Try that.

Make it a time of giving to those you care about.

 

[Ancient Wisdom]

It is important for children to be introduced to spirituality. The fundamentalist atheists who force feed their own views to their kids but criticize religious families are simply hypocritical.

 

[pittyakker]

There is nothing wrong with stories for children. Tell her about St Nicholas and get The Night Before Christmas. In the fullness of time, another kid will tell her santa isn't real, but meanwhile why spoil all those delightful childhood myths?

 

[GOD is my FATHER]

Tell her the truth- JESUS was born. That is the true meaning of CHRISTmas! Get her a kids bible, go to church & a Christmas eve service